'Untitled'

So I found a new one. 
A new boy, a new man. 
Different to everything else, 
Exactly the same as any other. 
Not even mine, though I feel comfortable. 
Feel as though I should be loyal. 
               Dare I tell him this? 
               Dare I whisper the words? 

I found a new fun. 
A new way, this time more casual. 
Different order to ever before, 
Exactly the same method. 
Not even a double digit, though I feel unworthy. 
Feel a need to impress the unimpressed. 
               Dare I tell him this secret? 
               Dare I whisper the words? 

I found a new age. 
A new time, this time more free. 
Different place to every past. 
Exactly the same manner. Habits. 
Not even without company, I feel alone, out of depth. 
Feel as though a disturbance wouldn't matter. 
               Dare I tell him the truth? 
               Dare I whisper the words? 

So then I found a new lie. 
A new fear, this time the truth. 
Different for me. 
Exactly the same for them. 
Not even wrong, I feel mistaken. 
Feel as though my actions are incorrect. 
               Dare I tell them the truth? 
               Dare I whisper the words? 

I'm having fun. 
But he's too old. 
They won't understand, 
                And the answer is no.
                        Full stop. 


17.7.12 ~ The Tainted