"No Title"

Every time it starts to get better there's a small reminder, a token of the past to bring those buried feelings to the surface. Every time someone asks

How are you?

You say

Pretty good thanks

But you're lying. Because everything you once knew, everything your life so revolved around, is gone and it doesn't care. Nothing does. Only you.

And you know you shouldn't. Because realistically you're better off now. It wasn't worth it, you deserve better.

The hardest part? Not knowing the truth. Not knowing when the lies started, if they ever weren't, who knew when I didn't.

The worst part? You were my best friend, my partner. I gave you everything, and you threw it back in my face because that wasn't enough. I wasn't. And I didn't even notice, you didn't even feel like you could tell me when it began. You gave up, and I was too distracted to see. Almost 3 years, then

I just want to be able to do what I want and have fun with mates. I just want to be single.

Single my ass, Mister new girlfriend three weeks later.

Hurt me with the truth. Don't make me feel better with lies. Pain will persist, but one day fade. Lies grow, twist, evolve, once unleashed never reigned back.

Grow some balls. Be a man for once and talk to me. Tell me to my face why you lied. Tell me to my face you cheated, manipulated, used, abused, tore. Look me in the eye and take responsibility. Quit your childish dance.

Have you found my top yet?

I don't give a s**t about your top. You want to talk to me, say something worth my time and the cent it costs me to reply to you.

You are not the person I fell in love with, not truly, not the person I thought you were, not the person I should be with.

So why am I still in love with you?


18.12.11 ~ The Broken